Sunday, April 15, 2012

Follow your Dream!

I had this (drunk but still managing to be charming and cute) guy at karoake tell me I was an amazing singer and that I should be on tv and selling records. I said thanks. He then proceeded to elaborate that I should be chasing my dream and not to let fear and self doubt slow me down. I tried to explain to him that singing isn't my dream. That I'm happy with what I do and what I have now.

He didn't believe me. He rambled on that the only reason I wasn't singing professionally was because I was too scared to try.

I tried to explain to him that I know exactly how good of a voice I have but it's not that fantastic. I can put over a song I know and love fairly well but my range isn't the best and my stage presence isn't that good. I've smoked for too long for my voice ever to be a real quality instrument.

He tried to get me to promise to get a vocal coach and start auditioning.

I started getting annoyed.

I enjoy singing. I have fun with it. I'm pretty good and I do like the applause. It's not my dream. Never has been.

It took me years to get really comfortable on stage. And auditions are awful. I tense and my voice goes higher than it should and I get extremely aware of every move I make.

I sing at home at, work while running the machines, and I karoake.

Singing to me is fun but it's too damn hard to make a real go of it if you have the ambition it takes to get noticed. rying to sing for a living means constant auditions for plays and bands and hours each day with vocal exercises. It's hard and demanding and not very rewarding unless you get lucky.

That is not the life that I want. I don't want to turn my fun into work. If I don't enjoy what I sing, I don't sing it well. I try to pick songs that I'm feeling and sing out my emotions. Take the strife and heartache and good times wrap it in a tune and get it outta myself.

Why do people assume they know what you really want? I know what I want. I'm living the life I want. If I wasn't I'd be trying for something else.

My dream is to work at a job I find fulfilling. To be able to pay my bills and set a little to the side. To be able to spend time with friends and family. I wouldn't mind someone to share it all with. But I am content with my own company.

When I get older and closing in on retirement, I want to run my own little B&B.

They are small dreams but that's all I need to be happy.

I love big dreamers. I admire their passion and devotion. But that just isn't me. Ambition for material things never has been a goal for me.

Go forth and dream your dream and live it as best you can. Don't tell me my dream isn't good enough for me. It's mine and I am fiercely protective of it.

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